Have you noticed that there is hardly any middle ground in the workforce these days? It seems like people are either A) out of a job following a layoff, or B) worked to death as one of the remaining survivors.

This isn’t good. As any project manager can tell you, it’s important to have enough margin in the system to allow for both expected and unexpected events (I would argue even the “unexpected” should be expected – medical leaves and resignations are part of conducting business).

According to the financial press, a great many companies are profitable even in a recession. Why? Because they have a workforce that is pulling the weight that was previously shouldered by many more employees. And while those who monitor efficiency ratios and FTEs (full-time-equivalents) are naturally delighted, I observe the average worn-out and traumatized worker with concern.

As moms, we can all vouch that few things are as demoralizing long-term as the realization that we are unable to produce to the level of our capabilities.  We’ve all experienced it starting with the firstborn; of necessity, we have to let go of any pre-baby OCD tendencies and realize the schedule has to become flexible, we will forget to thaw dinner, and we can indeed carry on with one eye shut and four hours of intermittent sleep.

But we can’t do it indefinitely. After the initial euphoria of “Hey, I’m actually holding it together,” we start to go a little numb in a sad way. This is how the creep of survival-mode can overtake our mojo. We’re meeting our obligations, but there’s no glory in it.  That streak of brilliance, that stamp of workmanship that is uniquely ours, starts to get lost, because it’s all we can do to meet the daily demands of e-mail, deadlines, and a haze of meetings. After all, the work keeps on whether the cubicle next to ours is empty or not, and dinner time comes again as surely as the sun rises.

In an effort at self-preservation, we start to disengage a bit and accept that it’s just the best we can do. With the overtone of “you’re lucky to have a job/family/house,” we keep marching. We can submit our report knowing we wanted to do more, but since they cut the administrative staff we spent two hours of productive time at the copy machine. Yet there are no excuses to be made at home to a child’s adoring little face.

So moms, let’s agree not to be too hard on ourselves or the dads who are trying to endure this season. There are some brilliant minds on the sidelines right now that are eager to get back to work and just as frustrated that they can’t contribute. Hopefully they will be joining us again as soon as employers can observe that even a star employee can’t innovate or inspire when she’s burned out.